'he’s not my god:' widow slammed for moving on after husband’s death
a mother of two who recently lost her husband faced all...
sep 23 2024
2 minute read
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a mother of two who recently lost her husband faced all kinds of backlash after she doled out advice on moving on.
in earlier videos, the user who goes by @coach_holly_ on tiktok, revealed her husband died five months ago after the two were together for nine years.
a user appears to ask the widow, “your husband just died, why are you acting like everything is fine?”
holly’s 30-second response , which has more than 286,000 views, accompanies a video of herself baking with her young children with the caption, “keep it moving, don’t live in the past.”
“because he’s not my god. because one guy dying isn’t going to ruin the rest of my life. because one bad thing isn’t going to ruin you, either,” the voiceover says.
“what has happened that leads you to think that everything is feeling bad and dark and depressing?” she asks. “we gotta fix it, you gotta root it out. you gotta start walking towards something better.”
she adds: “stop living in the past, stop living in your head and start walking towards a better future and a better tomorrow because i promise you, if you will start looking forward to something and create a reason to wake up every day beyond just survival, you will start to feel feelings of happiness and joy again.”
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while some users defended holly by saying that everyone grieves differently, most people were shocked and angry, mostly by the line in which she refers to her late husband, saying: “one guy dying isn’t going to ruin the rest of my life.”
“my husband died unexpectedly four years ago and never would i ever refer to it as ‘just one man dying,’ one woman commented.
“it’s a whole life we had planned dying,” the user continued. “i know that grief looks different for everyone, but wow!”
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a second person added: “losing someone you love is more than just one bad thing happening.”
another remarked that holly seemed to be in denial.
“this feels like avoidance,” they wrote. “as someone who had a similar mindset after losing her kids, it came back and bit me years later. i hope you let yourself feel it at some point.”
holly did have her share of supporters.
“i truly hope my spouse feels this way if anything ever happens to me,” one woman commented. “i get it. life does go on … whether we want it to or not.”
holly responded: “we had the conversation ahead of time. we wanted to know what to do if something ever happened to the other. this is how we decided to handle it.”
the motivational coach doubled down in another video in response to someone commenting that she was angering people yet keeping the video up.
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“people pleasing has to stop. it’s 2024, for heaven’s sake.”
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