so in the midst of the deluge of really bad news, how can we remain grounded, not only for ourselves, but also those we love – especially the little ones?
“obviously, limit exposure to this kind of news for kids under four years old,” says young. “older kids will be looking to us to see how we are responding. the biggest thing for them is what does mom or dad think about what is happening, or what does my teacher think?”
acknowledging fear is also important and healthy, says young, who has four children. she says it’s okay to admit that you feel worried and scared, which validates your child’s feelings, but be sure to follow up with reassurance that there are people in charge who have control of the situation and who are taking care of those who are hurting.
“i would say things like, ‘when something terrible like this happens, there are experts who get together and figure out solutions so that it never happens again. i trust them and it’s going to be ok,’” she says.
and while this may work in comforting a five year old, as an adult, i am going to need a little – okay, a lot – more than that. because we, as adults, know that there aren’t always experts in charge, they don’t always know how to fix stuff and they certainly don’t always take care of those who need help.