why a potentially illegal form of sex therapy has so many defenders

somatic sex education (sse) is a kind of sex therapy that people undergo by themselves or with a partner. i t always starts with talking over a problem, but it differs from traditional sex therapy in that it focuses on the client processing how they feel in their body. in some cases, it might involve the client removing clothing in an attempt to feel more comfortable. and sometimes — but not always — the practitioner will ask the client if they want sexological bodywork, where they may teach something that involves touching the client’s genitals. it might be an attempt to show a client new or more comfortable ways to receive sexual pleasure, or to help with pain, or to teach them how to feel more present during sex. rather than describing something like that, in the way a doctor or a traditional sex therapist might, the client will literally feel their way through.

it isn’t about gratification — some practitioners say they make it exceedingly clear to potential clients that people seeking sex workers should go elsewhere. (there are sex workers who might integrate aspects of somatic sex education into what they do, but sse on its own is an entirely different practice.) it’s meant to educate, and often to heal. people might turn to sse for a variety of reasons: sometimes it’s someone who wants to start enjoying sex again after experiencing trauma, like a difficult labour and childbirth or a sexual assault. some people visit a practitioner after getting gender-affirming surgery. it can also be helpful alongside more traditional medical interventions for people with pelvic floor disorders. but for many people, it’s just about wanting to enjoy sex more — learning how to experience pleasure without getting in your head or worrying about how your body looks.

sexological bodywork — the part of somatic sex education that can involve genital touch or penetration — has been getting a lot of more attention recently. in october, the practice was featured on “sex, love & goop,” the netflix show about relationships that’s the most recent iteration of gwyneth paltrow’s wellness brand. goop, to put it mildly, isn’t known for its practicality, or its reliable dissemination of health advice: it sells “ psychic vampire repellant ” and $1,700 wine decanters , and advocates for vaginal insertion of a jade egg to correct hormonal imbalances — a false claim that cost the company usd $145,000 in lawsuits. so the brand’s embrace of a controversial sex therapy seemed like another frivolous attempt at provocation — until you watch the show.

critics were pleasantly surprised, too. “with ‘sex, love & goop’ — her new netflix reality show — [paltrow] may finally have found a career pivot worth getting behind,” tv critic inkoo kang wrote in the washington post . and this in the atlantic from culture writer sophie gilbert: “i started watching ‘sex, love & goop’ limbered up for new feats of eye-rolling. but somewhere amid a discussion of the ‘erotic blueprints’ that define how individual people relate to sex, i realized i was riveted.”

camille, sexological bodyworker darshana avila and shandra in netflix’s “sex, love & goop.” (courtesy of netflix)

sexological bodywork began in oakland, california in the 1980s. it was the height of the aids epidemic, and dr. joseph kramer developed the practice as a way for hiv-positive men to “ experience safe touch and healing .” the practice took off in holistic communities across the u.s., canada, europe and australia, and was adopted by by sexologist and feminist sex educator annie sprinkle, among others.

corinne diachuk, who worked as somatic sex educator for just under a decade and is now a board member of the institute for the study of somatic sex education in victoria, b.c., was drawn to the practice because it was a service she was looking for herself.

liam “captain” snowdon, caffyn jesse and corinne diachuk. (supplied)

the institute, based in victoria, is the only somatic sex education school in canada. there are more american students than canadian, diachuk says, although people sign up from all over the world: south america, europe, the caribbean, south africa. training involves taking five courses — some online, some in person — and after each one, a student and their mentor have a conversation about whether they should continue. professional training doesn’t start until the third course — the first two are just about learning for yourself — and in the later years, students pick a specialization. that could involve working with a specific demographic, like people who have survived sexual assault or people who need specific pelvic care after birthing children, or integrating sse into another practice like yoga or myofascial massage . the entire five-course training takes two or three years. the first course costs about $780 (the amount is approximate, because fees are calculated in usd) and the prices go up as students move through the curriculum, with the final course at about $2,100.

one of her former clients had vaginismus, a condition where vaginal muscles contract involuntarily during penetration, which can make sex very painful . the woman’s doctor was treating her with vaginal dilators to expand her muscles.

corinne diachuk, sex educator katie spataro and liam “captain” snowdon are on faculty at the institute for the study of somatic sex education. (supplied)

there are also potential repercussions for their clients, she says. the law is less grey and more black and white when it comes to buying sex than providing it: anyone convicted of purchasing sexual services could face up to five years in jail .

building a website to advertise sse services, or sharing an office, also come with risks, according to sections 286.1-5 of the criminal code . it’s illegal to advertise sexual services, for one thing. it’s also illegal to receive material benefit from sexual services, so an administrative assistant or anyone else working for a practitioner is also committing a crime, even if they don’t perform the services themselves. also against the law is hiring someone to perform the services — which could be a problem for a small business trying to recruit therapists, williamson explains. and while immunity is sometimes granted for some of these offences if someone is advertising or selling their own services, if anyone shares an office or advertises services provided by another practitioner, that’s also a crime.

the trickiest part of all of this is that these laws are still untested in most of the country. in ontario, for instance, the laws that ban sex workers from advertising, working together or communicating with clients were declared unconstitutional earlier this year. but that’s specific to one province — and even in ontario, both paying for sex and communication for the purpose of paying for sex are still illegal. it’s conceivable that the government could crack down on this work, with severe consequences for practitioners and their clients; it’s also possible that a legal challenge could lead to more permissive sex work laws.

somatic sex education is based on the “ wheel of consent ,” a concept developed by sexological bodyworker betty martin. it details the different ways in which consent should be communicated, how there are different ways to give and receive sexual acts. maclean gives the example of someone offering you a foot massage: it could be an act of service for you — or, if they have a foot fetish, it could be for their benefit more than yours. diachuk says part of the work of a somatic sex educator is to keep track of their own desires, conscious and unconscious, to ensure their personal proclivities remain separate from their work.