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cis, transgender, two-spirit: supporting canada's queer community starts with knowing the difference

accepting that people have the right to define their gender regardless of assigned sex and respecting gender identifications, pronouns, and names are just two ways to show support.

by sadaf ahsan

apr 26 2022

5 minute read

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canada is pretty queer: here are some tips on how to be an ally

there are many ways to define an ally, but all possess a want to learn, can address the barriers, and understand that support comes in many forms, according to pflag. getty

it’s only in recent years that we’ve begun to see data on just how, well, queer canada is. the answer is: very.

according to statistics canada , as of 2018, the country is home to approximately one million people who are lgbtq2+, which is about four per cent of the total population aged 15 and older. in addition, approximately 75,000 canadians identified as trans or non-binary, representing 0.24 per cent of the population aged 15 and older.

while this only scratches the surface in terms of data regarding this community, the 2021 census is set to paint a clearer picture with new questions explicitly focused on gender and which ask a person’s sex at birth and their gender at present. previously, only two options were listed when it came to asking about gender: male or female, which meant non-binary or transgender people were unable to answer and be accurately represented in the census.

there’s still work to be done, too, in terms of better access to health care and when it comes to the rise in hate crimes targeting lgbtq2+ canadians in 2019. in fact, transgender canadians are more likely to report their mental health as poor than their cisgender counterparts, more likely to have seriously contemplated suicide in their lifetimes, and also more likely to report being violently victimized than non-sexual minority canadians.

all of which means it’s important to be educated and aware of who this community is and how you can best be an ally starting today.

what does it mean to be transgender?

“for me personally, being transgender means identifying as having a gender that is not aligned with the sex that was assigned at birth,” says morgane oger, an award-winning vancouver-based activist and founder of the morgane oger foundation , which works to narrow the gap between canada’s laws and their equal implementation for all canadians.

she recalls the first time she saw a trans person, and how it impacted her understanding of what being transgender can look like: “i remember the day i found someone, living and breathing, who said the things that i felt, and i cried when i saw them. i was in university. i later recognized she was trans, probably early to mid-transition; it was a shock to my system that took me years to process and to realize that i saw something that i had never seen before and that it was possible to be that person.”

it took time to process, says oger, because of the way being trans was characterized on television.

“they were usually a dead person or a criminal, and i’d wonder, which is closest to me?” she says. “dangerous pervert that eats children, or victim of hatred, or cautionary-tale sex worker? it wasn’t until years later that i saw a trans person living a healthy life.”

what are the terms i should know?

sex. a biological term, sex is based on a set of typically physical and physiological characteristics that include genitals, gonads, hormones, chromosomes, and secondary sex characteristics.

gender identity. a person’s internal self-awareness of being a certain gender.

cis. a non-transgender identity, this describes an individual whose sex assigned at birth and gender identity are the same.

transgender. when an individual’s gender identity and sex assigned at birth do not match. according to rainbow health ontario , “it is an umbrella term for people who are not cis, and includes persons who are (or identify as) non-binary as well as transmasculine and transfeminine people.” some might opt to medically transition, which can involve taking hormones and gender confirmation surgery, but this is a personal choice.

non-binary. an umbrella term for those who do not identity as exclusively male or female. this can include those who identify as genderqueer or genderfluid.

two-spirit. “a person who identifies as having both a masculine and a feminine spirit, and is used by some indigenous people to describe their sexual, gender and/or spiritual identity,” according to re:searching for lgbtq2s+ health.

when it comes to pronouns, never assume

to know what pronouns an individual prefers, your first priority should always be to simply ask them (and perhaps by sharing yours first) and to never assume.

when it comes to names, some transgender and non-binary people will change their given one to another that better suits them and their gender. this is also key as, according to a trevor project report , using a transgender person’s chosen name resulted in a 29 per cent decrease in suicidal ideation and a 56 per cent decrease in suicidal behaviour.

below are some examples of pronouns that transgender people might use, also via the trevor project , and in order of nominative, objective, possessive determiner, possessive pronoun, and reflexive:

she, her, her, hers, and herself

he, him, his, his, and himself

they, them, their, theirs, and themself

ze/zie, hir, hir, hirs, and hirself

xe, xem, xyr, xyrs, and xemself

ve, ver, vis, vis, and verself

how to be an ally with transgender people

the first step is to “listen with an open mind to transgender people speaking for themselves,” according to glaad (gay & lesbian alliance against defamation), along with following thought leaders in the transgender community, and exploring easy to access resources , like books, films, documentaries and blogs that include the voices of transgender people.

“go where people in the lgbt community congregate, like your local pride parade, which is like the beginner’s guide to the queer universe,” says oger. “if that’s a really foreign space for you, that’s okay. go have a look. pretend you’re a tourist visiting another country, just like when people go to participate in cultural events.”

there are many ways to define an ally, but all possess a want to learn, can address the barriers, and understand that support comes in many forms, according to pflag (parents, families, and friends of lesbians and gays) . that includes accepting that people have the right to define their gender regardless of assigned sex; respecting people’s gender identifications, pronouns, and names; challenging anti-trans and sexist remarks, jokes, and comments through personal conversations; listening to the stories of people who are trans to better understand their experiences; and saying that you’re a trans ally and telling people why.

it’s also critical to know the challenges the trans community continues to face, that rates of discrimination are still high, and that legislative challenges are faced by trans people every day in some parts of the world.

ultimately, says oger: “allyship is being in a place of love and empathy, and trying to look at the big picture and to look at how to make our surroundings a better place. it’s common decency, basic courtesy, humanity, and empathy.”

sadaf ahsan is a toronto-based culture writer, editor and stereotypical middle child. she can be reached here.

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cis, transgender, two-spirit: supporting canada's queer community starts with knowing the difference

accepting that people have the right to define their gender regardless of assigned sex and respecting gender identifications, pronouns, and names are just two ways to show support.

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cis, transgender, two-spirit: supporting canada's queer community starts with knowing the difference

accepting that people have the right to de­fine their gender regardless of assigned sex and respecting gender identifications, pronouns, and names are just two ways to show support.

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accepting that people have the right to define their gender regardless of assigned sex and respecting gender identifications, pronouns, and names are just two ways to show support.